What a beautiful day to be alive!!
The sun is shining (every now and then) and the air is crisp and cool...a perfect fall day.
I slept well last night and woke up this morning feeling okay. Let me clarify by saying I am not going to run a marathon but the nausea is managable and the headache is under control. Dr. Younis gave me a couple more prescriptions yesterday that are helping control some of the other side effects, so overall the outlook is good! I am going to be smart and not vacuum, dust or clean the bathrooms but just relax and enjoy the day. I am going to take one of the meals out of the freezer for supper that my wonderful friends have made and put my feet up. I might not even get dressed to day (gasp!). This takes some discipline on my part but the resulting good health is worth it.
I am not mortified today, maybe just surprised at myself for revealing a vulnerable moment to the whole world. I am not afraid of dying and I say that with all honesty because I know I go to be with my Lord and isn't that our ultimate goal ? I guess when they use the word "terminal" and tell you that this treatment is all they can do it knocks you for a loop. I feel I have unfinished business here on earth. My baby is only 3! I want to see my sweet boys grow up to be beautiful men! I want to see my children get married and hold my grandchildren! Grow old with my husband!
So I guess I have to trust in the Lord that that is His will too and have faith that if it is not, He will look after every thing. I don't mean to sound defeatist because I have always been a fighter. My name after all means warrior. But when your journey reveals a possible pathway you need to explore it and come to terms with it. Look everything in the face and say Lord whatever your will I am ready.
That is what I had to do last night. But have no fear wonderwoman is back today (I just have to laugh out loud at that!) and all is well with my soul. God is good in so many ways. He is the ultimate doctor and healer.
I had a good cry reading all your emails and comments and feel so blessed to have friends and family who are so supportive and caring. I can't tell you what a blessing it is to read them. Relationships and friendships are growing that may not otherwise have done so if not for this cancer and for that I am thankful.
October is a month to be thankful and I have so much to be thankful for!
I slept well last night and woke up this morning feeling okay. Let me clarify by saying I am not going to run a marathon but the nausea is managable and the headache is under control. Dr. Younis gave me a couple more prescriptions yesterday that are helping control some of the other side effects, so overall the outlook is good! I am going to be smart and not vacuum, dust or clean the bathrooms but just relax and enjoy the day. I am going to take one of the meals out of the freezer for supper that my wonderful friends have made and put my feet up. I might not even get dressed to day (gasp!). This takes some discipline on my part but the resulting good health is worth it.
I am not mortified today, maybe just surprised at myself for revealing a vulnerable moment to the whole world. I am not afraid of dying and I say that with all honesty because I know I go to be with my Lord and isn't that our ultimate goal ? I guess when they use the word "terminal" and tell you that this treatment is all they can do it knocks you for a loop. I feel I have unfinished business here on earth. My baby is only 3! I want to see my sweet boys grow up to be beautiful men! I want to see my children get married and hold my grandchildren! Grow old with my husband!
So I guess I have to trust in the Lord that that is His will too and have faith that if it is not, He will look after every thing. I don't mean to sound defeatist because I have always been a fighter. My name after all means warrior. But when your journey reveals a possible pathway you need to explore it and come to terms with it. Look everything in the face and say Lord whatever your will I am ready.
That is what I had to do last night. But have no fear wonderwoman is back today (I just have to laugh out loud at that!) and all is well with my soul. God is good in so many ways. He is the ultimate doctor and healer.
I had a good cry reading all your emails and comments and feel so blessed to have friends and family who are so supportive and caring. I can't tell you what a blessing it is to read them. Relationships and friendships are growing that may not otherwise have done so if not for this cancer and for that I am thankful.
October is a month to be thankful and I have so much to be thankful for!
posted by Kelly @ 10:51 am
6 Comments:
At Sat Sept 30, 12:32:00 pm,
Anonymous said…
I kept checking every half hour to see if you were feeling better and could blog today! I remember when we talked on the phone just after this all began. You have the same assurance you had then. What an encouragement you are.
Love Esther
At Sat Sept 30, 01:59:00 pm,
Anonymous said…
Hi there, Kelly,
Sorry I haven't been keeping up to date on your week - Christian's twins have been keeping me in the city for a bit. :)
I think that the Lord is just so good! He's always with us, especially when things click inside us, like what happened to you on Friday. I want you to know that I have been specifically praying for you about when the doc's/medical team's info would hit you.
I'm glad you know that the Big Doc up there, His info is right on. He will never leave you, He will sustain you, "He is bigger than any mountain that we can or cannot see." (Do you remember that song - I've been belting it out much to the chagrin of my kids' ears! I'll should just stick to pounding the piano keys and leave the singing be!)
Sometimes, I feel like I fight a panic about what could happen to me and my family - you see many things in my line of work. One verse that helps me is Ps. 3:4-6 "I lie down and sleep; I wake again because the the Lord sustains me." I like to be in control. :) Learning to give it over to the Lord, the One who actually has control, is something I'm learning daily. You inspire me!
You rest and keep fighting - I am so proud to know wonderwoman! Okay, I'll stop my soapboxin' (I must get it from my Dad!) and go get some sunshine. Thanks for keeping us all updated!
Love, Courtney
At Sat Sept 30, 05:22:00 pm,
Jenn said…
Hi Kelly, I'm new to the whole blogging thing so I just wanted to tell you today how very brave I think you are. I should have told you in person by now but I'm better at typing than talking alot of the time :)
I'm glad you are feeling good today!
Praying for you,
Jenn Slauenwhite
At Sat Sept 30, 06:26:00 pm,
Anonymous said…
Hi! Kelly: I was praying for you off and on all day yesterday and I am so glad to hear that you are doing ok. What a testimony you are of what GOD can do in the storms of life. He truly does carry us through. He is our strength when we are weak. Praise the Lord for that.
Enjoy your what I call pajama day.
Linda
At Sun Oct 01, 10:35:00 pm,
Anonymous said…
Rest lots!!!!! Allow your body to heal. Your immune system needs lots of support and rest right now to do the job that God planned for it to do. If the truth were known, we would all realize that on a daily basis we have cells that are mutating but that is where the white blood cells come in....they come in and surround the cell and destory it before it can start to multiply. That is why we need to be careful of what we put into our bodies because it can upset the way things are supposed to work.
Hope you're feeling well enough to get the boys off to school tomorrow. Rest while they are at school. Ask Mom to give you a hand with the house work. It's okay. She is willing to do whatever you need her to.
Love you!!!!
Lorie
At Tue Oct 03, 10:57:00 pm,
Anonymous said…
Hey Wonderwoman - welcome back!
Have I told you how amazing you are, well I'm telling you now girl!
Each day is a new blessing isn't it and God has a plan for you in it!
So glad your not"Mortified" for sharing your vulnerable moment with us all. I know I feel so priveledged to be a part of your life and that you are so willing to open your heart.
Lots of Hugs and kisses,
Leanne
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